As a “Romance” novelist, I have found myself asking more and more, ‘Is Romance dead?’
Maybe, dying a slow lingering death would be closer to being the question in question. Hey, it’s not like I don’t believe in Romance. I do. Hopelessly devoted to the stuff. Romance makes me happy, but as I look out over the landscape of our society, I see emphasis on it lessening. The act of love seems to hold a lesser importance in the eyes of people. To me, feel free to tell me if I’m wrong, people care more about the immediate ‘act of love’ than the lasting emotional attachment of romantic love.
Just think about it. In the last decade or so, terms have moved away from true love, love at first sight, and the flow of romance songs to the terminology of Booty Calls, Hook Ups, and any other sayings you might have heard. As a result of all this physical dependence on what should be a purely emotional occupation, I see humanity becoming less human and more animalist. Sorry if that offends anyone, but people not caring to fall in love offends me.
Seriously, this has nothing to do with me being a Romance author and more with me being a member of the human race. Our ability to love and receive love is what makes us more evolved than any other animal on this planet. Make no mistake, we are animals. We give into our baser selves too much not to be. By giving and receiving love we rise above what we are to achieve and what we can be. That might sound sappy, but quite frankly I don’t care. I would rather offer and lose my heart than spend a lifetime wondering what all the fuss was about it.
It kinda of makes me sad to hear people talking more about hook-ups and getting one than finding that right person. I’m not just talking about guys but also women. This is where things get depressing so feel free to avert your eyes if you’re the tender sort.
The loss of Romance can only mean one thing. Magic has truly died in our world. Dragons no longer exist except in our imaginations. Yes, I truly believe dragons existed, unicorns too. Why because it makes me happy to think they did. But, over the course of humanity’s evolution, we’ve lost the ability to believe in anything that is not before our eyes. That being said, how far behind those things can true love be? Not far, by the looks of popular media.
Let’s face it, we are evolving. Emotion gives way to stoic dependency on reality. Reality has no place for emotions, except for hate and sadness. Those are emotions that our society can safely explain. Love? That one sits outside scientists’ ability to document and fits into their thesis about the human condition. Closest they can come is saying it’s a chemical reaction to pheromone production or electrical stimuli based solely on physical appearance. Again those with tender sensibilities turn away. I call bullshit of the highest order. There kiss it and move on scientist.
This trend does not just sadden me because as a Romance novelist ‘Romance’ is my bread and butter. That is only a small part of my heart break over it. To appreciate the magical nature of my books, you have to believe in the magic of love. To make this work a better place, you need to believe that the magic of love can change hearts and lives. More and most importantly, you NEED to believe your life can be moved and changed because someone loves you and in turn you can open yourself to loving them. Sometimes, as authors, we paint unfair expectations of what love can be. I agree totally with that. We do, but we also do something else. We open lives and hearts to expecting love. Isn’t that worth the risk of making people, women and men, believe love exists and can be magical when most of the time love escapes that quality. Still it’s out there. How can I be so sure? I have it, so know you can. I even know where it comes from. Feel free to disregard my theory if it doesn’t mesh with yours.
I believe in a God above. If that God isn’t yours, that’s okay. Mine loves you all the same. And, in my eyes, love and as a result Romance is one of the greatest gifts our heavenly Father has given us. Having an empathetic connection to one another is our connection to Him. I’m not saying romance is dying because of the loss of belief in God. I leave that to you to decide. I’m just here to present my views and give you cause to think for yourself. I would never impose my views on you. You have your experiences and beliefs to define your world.
That said, I leave you with this.
Whatever you believe, never believe without an open heart. Live with a loving heart. If you can accomplish those things, what a wonderful world it would be.
And, one I hope to be a part of.
Til next week, love out loud and as always happy reading,